Insert bad word Of A Christmas Cousin
by CaPtain SpOcKettE
Summary: What would Christmas be without eggnog, presents, oh and a trashy cousin. REPOST *If you don't like my work, DON'T READ MY STORIES OR LEAVE IRRELEVANT REVIEWS* To anyone else enjoy, kisses ;)


_Disclaimer: I don't own anything that was in Twilight or belongs to S. Meyers._

**_AN: I was JUST about to start writing my stories again when I decided to check FFN first & saw I got a notice & think some POS reported this story & had MY work I wrote removed b/c my TITLE had the word "cunt" in it...seriously? I was locked out of my account & now have an "infraction" on my record. So how about the cunt who reported me send me a PM so I can tell you what I think of you since you're so tough. If you don't like the tittle or my work then don't read the fucking story loser! If someone did report me, you & FFN admins can kiss my ass! It was obviously a hater or FFN playing Big Brother as usual. Thanks you just proved I'm better than you & I always save my stories *blows kiss*. I've been so angry I couldn't even write but another quick Sam/Leah story came to mind so that should help with my anger & get me back to writing. Please rerview I'd appreciate the love this one time, I need it smh._**

_**Cunt of a Christmas Cousin **_

Emily and her family decided to come down to the Clearwater's a few weeks before Christmas to be able to spend more time with the family and catch up. Leah and Emily had been inseparable, going in and out of the house, as were Seth and Emily's little brother and their parents enjoyed every minute of not having to deal with their kids.

"Ok bye, I love you."-Leah smiled into the phone before hanging up. She sighed happily and flopped back onto her bed giggling as Emily came into the room.

"Let me guess, Sam called."-she said rolling her eyes playfully, but with some sincerity behind it.

Leah had told her all about Sam when they'd first started dating a couple of years ago and as their relationship progressed, so did Leah's phone calls about how amazing Sam was and how he was "the one". She told Emily how sweet he was and all the wonderful things he does for her and Emily was growing tired of it, if not from jealousy, and believed Leah was over exaggerating or rubbing it in, but she never said anything just held the phone away from her ear and hummed every now and then to seem as if she was really listening. But now with Leah face to face it was hard to hide her annoyance and jealousy.

"So what did the _amazing_ Sam do this time?"-she asked sitting on Leah's bed. They were best friends but Emily really was sick of hearing about Sam and sometimes wondered if he even existed; Leah slapped her playfully and sat up on the bed.

"Don't hate. Anyway, he talked to daddy and somehow got him to agree to let him stay over for the week since he and his family were coming over on Christmas anyway. A whole week, I get to be with him for a whole week in my house!"-she squealed; Emily gave a tight smile.

"How'd he work that?"-she asked but she was eager to finally see the amazing Sam and see just how amazing Leah claims he is.

"Since your dad and brother and my dad and brother will be in the house he was able to show him how it would be impossible for anything to happen. You know how daddy is; you'd never guess I was twenty-one."-she chuckled as she started rummaging through her closet to pick out each outfit for everyday of the week now that Sam was coming early.

"Good I finally get to meet him."-Emily said as she helped Leah pick some things out.

"He can go shopping with us when we go. That way my two besties can get to know each other."-Leah said and they picked outfits out and gossiped for the rest of the day.

_**L+S=L+S=L+S=L+S=L+S**_

"He's here he's here!"-Leah shouted as she ran to the door before her aunt grabbed her arm.

"Clam down girl. You never go running to a man; you either make him wait or have him come to you."-she said and the men rolled their eyes. Leah laughed but followed her advice and sat back down with her knee bouncing anxiously.

"Hey Sam,"-Harry greeted and gave a handshake that was a little more firm than necessary.

"Hey Harry; where's my girl?"-Sam asked politely and that was Leah's breaking point because she hopped up and ran, jumping into his waiting arms.

"Sam you made it!"-she gushed

"Yep just for my baby."-he said and Harry and Leah's uncle cleared their throats so Sam released her and gave a small nervous smile.

"Come on in and meet the rest of the family."-Seth said shaking his head from behind Harry who watched every move Sam's hands made.

"Sam this is my aunt Tina, her husband Dan whose throat was dry just a minute ago and her kids my cousins, Byron and Emily."-Leah said as they stepped into the living room.

Emily was expecting someone but she wasn't expecting _him_; he was _gorgeous_. She gave him a long once over and slowly stood, walking over to him with her hips swaying and extended her hand but palm down.

"A gentleman kisses a ladies hand when he greets her and from the way Leah always speaks about you you're a gentleman."-she said in a low voice that had her mother and brother Byron looking at her weird.

"Nice to finally meet you. Leah's told me all about you."-Sam said as he uncomfortably, lightly pecked her hand before releasing it. Emily let her hand linger longer than necessary and Sam didn't have a good feeling about her.

"All good things I'm sure."-she said with a wink and he gave an uncomfortable smile and put his arm around Leah, pulling her close. Emily's smile she was giving Sam fell and she realized she was flirting with Leah's boyfriend and felt so embarrassed and guilty, but not as much as she should have.

"Hey Sam; I swear you get more handsome every time I see you."-Sue smiled as she pecked him on the cheek.

"I don't think that's possible."-Leah smiled and they all rolled their eyes smiling, everyone except Emily.

Leah and Sam were glued to each other from the moment he came in, lessening the time she spent with Emily but that's to be expected. Emily was growing more and more annoyed and jealous of Leah and Sam's relationship. Every single thing Leah said about Sam was true: he was damn near perfection and Emily couldn't understand why she didn't have someone like Sam or maybe even Sam himself.

She always found herself sitting back watching Sam: the way he laughed, the way he smiled, his muscular build and large hands. She was resenting Leah with every laugh she gave or happy sigh she uttered due to something Sam said or did. The embarrassment and guilt she felt a few days ago was fading fast, just as fast as her attraction and desire to claim Sam for herself grew. Why should Leah have him? That's when Emily began slyly flirting with Sam and trying to get his attention not knowing someone or two someones noticed her behavior.

Leah noticed the way Emily had been acting short tempered with her and paying a little too much attention to Sam, but she refused to entertain the thought, knowing her cousin would never cross that line. She felt a little guilty she wasn't spending as much time with her as she was before Sam got there so she asked Emily if she wanted to catch the Hobbits at the movies.

"Is Sam coming with us?"-she asked

"Nope just us."-Leah smiled

"Oh, well I guess, sure."-Emily said none too enthusiastic. Leah frowned but left it at that…for now.

"Is Sam going where?"-he asked coming up behind Leah and kissing her cheek making her giggle. Emily rolled her eyes and sighed loudly.

"Is there a problem?"-he asked Emily and she turned a little red and cleared her throat while shaking her head.

"I was just asking Emily to the movies to see the Hobbits."-Leah said getting fed up with Emily.

"I forgot that came out. I need to pick something up at the mall anyway so you girls wouldn't mind if I joined you would you?"-Sam asked

"Actu-"

""Not at all."-Emily cut off Leah.

"I need to talk to your dad for a minute. I'll meet you outside we can take my car."-Sam said then gave Leah a sloppy kiss and laughed as she swatted him away.

"What was that about?'-Leah asked Emily once he was gone.

"What do you mean?"-she asked feigning innocent.

"I mean you've been acting like a bitch to me because of how much time I've been spending with Sam and when I ask you out just the _two_ of us, you eagerly agree for him to come along. What the fuck is that about?"-Leah demanded

"N-nothing Leah. You're with Sam, I understand that. I'd feel guilty for taking him away from you when I've had you all to myself for three weeks."-she laughed nervously; Leah stood staring her down before walking into her room to get dressed. Emily wiped her sweaty brow and went into the living room to wait and that's where she heard their conversation.

"So that's the real reason why you wanted to come down here early and spend time with us?"-Harry asked as Emily tip toed to the wall to peek into the kitchen where they were talking.

"Yes sir. I promise I'll treat her right and take good care of her."-Sam said nervously as he waited for Harry to say something. Emily was confused on what was being talked about but had a feeling she already knew and she didn't like it at all. There was a long pause as Harry stared Sam down and Sam nervously waited.

"I couldn't ask for a better man for the job. You have my blessing to marry my daughter."-he smiled and Sam sighed loudly in relief the same time Emily gasped. Tears welled in her eyes from sadness and anger; she wanted him and she'd be damned if she just gave up because he got Harry's blessing to marry _Leah_.

Emily ran into the living room acting as if she was there the entire time and hadn't heard any of their conversation, wiping her tears. When Leah came down the stairs she still looked annoyed and kept her distance from Emily and Emily was glad because when Sam came into the room smiling at Leah like he'd won the lottery she was sure if Leah was close enough she would've snatched every strand of hair from her head.

"Hey baby,"-Sam gushed obviously excited and giddy that he had Harry's permission to marry his daughter, not that he wouldn't have even if he said no, but it was still nice to know the father approved. Leah smiled and went to kiss his cheek but he turned his head and kissed her wholeheartedly making her giggle breathlessly when thy broke apart.

"Can we go?"-Emily snapped and walked out the door to the car. Leah took calming breaths to keep from snatching Emily's eyes out.

"Is everything alright?"-Sam asked

"Maybe we should skip the movie and go to the park. We could make a snow man."-Leah suggested with a smile.

"I want to see the movie, besides I told you I have something to pick up."-he said excited as he grabbed her hand and drug her to the car.

"Is that something for me?"-she asked hopeful.

"Maybe; but you'll have to wait and find out."-Sam winked and she playfully hit his arm and went to get in the front seat but stopped dead in her tracks when she saw Emily was there. She yanked the door open and glared at her.

"You must be shitting me!"-she hissed

"I always sit in the front."-Emily said; with her new information she wasn't going to let Leah intimidate her or feel guilty about going after Sam.

"Not in my fucking boyfriend's car you don't!"-Leah exclaimed and went to reach for a wide eyed Emily when Sam pulled her back.

"Backseat,"-he said sternly as he held Leah's waist and Emily jumped out and flew in the back.

She didn't think Leah would try and hit her, not yet at least, maybe after she had Sam but not this soon. He held the door open for Leah and closed when she got in. The only reason he wanted to go was so Emily could see that he was with Leah, _period_ and she needed to back off. He didn't tell Leah of Emily's advances because he didn't want to upset her and he hadn't confronted Emily because he was giving her a chance to be a lady and back off, but his patients was wearing thin.

At the mall and in the theater Emily continued on, acting as if she and Sam were together and made sure to try and come between Leah and Sam when they got close. Sam had to keep Leah calm while giving Emily silent warnings to leave him alone.

Leah was annoyed that Sam didn't say anything to Emily about her behavior and started wondering if he was enjoying it; she wasn't sure if Emily wanted Sam or if she just wanted to make her mad but either way she felt Sam should've spoken up. Little did she know however, is Sam knew what was going on and if he spoke what he really wanted to, Emily would probably kill herself; he was trying to remain calm and be a gentleman while sending Emily a message.

During the movie Emily kept grabbing on Sam and leaning in to talk to him or eating his popcorn. Sam decided to move his seat and pulled Leah with him to a few rows up where Emily couldn't sit with them but could see them. Leah was fit to be tied but Sam made sure to give her all his attention and Leah was reassured he was hers and that was that, so she forgot about Emily and enjoyed the movie. She gave a satisfied smile when Emily stormed out of the theater when Sam started kissing on her. After the movie they found Emily in the lobby playing Pac Man. Sam didn't want to leave them alone but he really needed to get to the store before they closed and he couldn't have Leah with him when he did.

"You girls play nice. I'll meet you at the car; I have to go pick something up real fast. I'll only be a minute."-he said, kissed Leah quickly and jogged off. Emily watched him go knowing exactly where he was going; there was only one store in this mall that would have what he was picking up.

"I am warning you one time and one time only, back off of my boyfriend."-Leah said fuming. Emily turned to Leah smirking but kept space between them.

"Why whatever do you mean dear cousin?"-she said

"You know damn well what I mean."-Leah hissed

"I have no idea what you're talking about. But as far as boyfriends go, I can't do anything they don't want me to do. Maybe your boyfriend has eyes for someone else."-she said and walked off with Leah following.

They argued the whole way and when they turned towards the exit Emily had led them to, she looked to see if she was right and she was. There was Sam in the jewelry store smiling as he shook hands with a man in a suit as he handed him a small bag and she could see the man was congratulating him. Tears welled in her eyes as she balled her fist and stormed back to the car.

The ride home was nothing but tense and Sam could tell something went down while he was in the store. Emily went right to the room her parents were using when she got there instead of Leah's room.

"Is everything alright?"-Sue asked when she saw the two feuding females go to opposite rooms, slamming the doors. Sam just shrugged not knowing what to say especially with Emily's mother sitting right there looking after where her daughter went with suspicious eyes.

_**L+S=L+S=L+S=L+S=L+S**_

It was finally Christmas and Sam's family had arrived and Leah decided she would forget Emily but she couldn't help but think of her words. _But as far as boyfriends go, I can't do anything they don't want me to do. Maybe your boyfriend has eyes for someone else. _Did Sam really want Emily and was he playing her? She hated that she would even think that, but she didn't think her cousin would flirt with her boyfriend either and look how that turned out.

They ate breakfast and despite the obvious tension, everyone was having a good time. The boys turned up the speakers when Run DMC's Christmas in Hollis Queens came on and started jumping around as the women were in the kitchen baking like they always did on Christmas while the men brought the gifts down and out of hiding.

Sam wanted to present Leah with the ring in front of his and her family, but he wanted her to unwrap it first and thought it would be fun to annoy her, so he put the ring box inside of several boxes then wrapped it.

"You know she'll get tired of opening box after box and probably throw it across the rom."-Seth laughed; Sam told Seth he was proposing knowing he'd act like a baby if he didn't know once everyone found out.

"I'm counting on it."-Sam laughed as he placed Leah's one and only gift under the tree; he knew she wouldn't care about anything else once he proposed. Emily was sitting by the kitchen door and saw the exchange and wanted so badly to throw the box in the trash or maybe…

"Cookies are ready!"-Sue called as they came into the room with dish after dish of cookies and other Christmas decorated deserts.

"Gifts are ready too!"-Harry said as he snatched an entire plate of snowman cookies.

The men and boys wrestled each other for the plates of cookies they'd swiped, with everyone laughing and enjoying themselves. Emily walked over to the gifts under the tree as everyone laughed and fought over cookies. She searched for the gift Sam had place under the tree and when she found it, quickly swiped the tag he'd put on her gift for Leah's gift then went back over to everyone smiling.

Sam had already gotten Emily a gift before he arrived at Leah's along with her parents and decided it was nothing special so he'd give it to her anyway, but with a note inside instructing her he never wanted to see her again, to leave him alone and he only waited this long because he liked her family and didn't want to cause a scene during Christmas time.

"Gift time!"-Seth shouted and literally dove under the tree with his cousin and Sam's younger brothers following suit. After a few gifts were opened Sam nervously asked Leah to open the one he'd gotten her.

"Why don't we open the gifts he got us at the same time Leah."-Emily said and Sue found it odd as did Emily's mother but they figured it was nothing and kept talking. Emily quickly tossed Leah "her gift" and ripped "hers" open, tossing the boxes. When Sam saw what gift Emily had his heart sank and he went to tell them they had the wrong gifts but Emily already had it open.

"Oh my gosh Sam it's beautiful!"-Emily gasped as she put the ring on and it was. It cost him two months' salary. Everyone turned at her gasp and gasped themselves in shock and confusion. Harry was none too pleased.

"That's n-"

"Oh thank you Sam I love it!"-Emily gushed and jumped up to hug him. Before he could push her off and get to Leah, Leah gasped herself and he closed his eyes when he saw she not only saw Emily had the ring but she'd read the note intended for Emily.

_Maybe your boyfriend has eyes for someone else. _The words seemed to shout at her in her mind. She didn't want to believe it, she couldn't believe it, but as she said to herself earlier in the week, she never imagined Emily would take her man from her but here she was.

"Leah this is a mistake that's n-"

"What's the matter Leah? Didn't Sam get you something nice too?"-Emily cut Sam off not wanting Sam to speak and to everyone one else she sounded genuinely confused, but to the people who'd noticed her behavior they knew otherwise and couldn't believe it had gotten this serious.

"How could you,"-Leah sobbed, lost between not trusting what was happening and realizing people aren't always what they seem.

"Leah please-"

"Sam what are you doing?"-his mom asked shaking her head, eyes wide.

"What's going on here?"-Harry demanded glaring at Sam then Emily.

"I don'-"

"What's wrong cousin?"-Emily said and Leah jumped up and grabbed Emily by her hair, swinging her around. The two started fighting knocked over the Christmas tree, trampling the gifts. The men broke it up, but not before blood was shed, mostly Emily's.

"I hate you both!"-Leah yelled sobbing then ran to her room slamming the door. Emily's mom tended to her wounds in the bathroom while Sue went to see if Leah was ok and find out what was going on.

Those left in the living room tried to figure out what the hell had just happened. Harry being held back by Dan and Levi, Sam's father, when he read the note Sam had written and was furious and confused. Sam told them what had been going on with Emily and Emily's father became the one who needed to be held back.

Sue came back downstairs and told them everything Leah had told her and it seemed to go with what Sam said, so when Emily came back into the room with her face wrapped, ice to her head, and bald spots, they demanded an explanation; her father refused to believe anything that was said. Emily told her lies, saying Sam chased her and she just felt a pull to him and couldn't deny it anymore and never meant to hurt Leah.

Most in the room didn't believe her but there was no proof for either side until those who'd noticed Emily's behavior stepped forward.

"Just stop Lying Emily."-her mother shouted and everyone looked to her.

"I'm not-"

"Yes you are and you know it. Sue, Harry I am _so_ sorry. If I'd known it would get this far I would've stepped in and said something sooner. I saw the way Emily looked at Sam when she met him and her gentlemen kiss a lady act. I figured she thought Sam attractive and I saw her flirt somewhat, but I never knew she was _truly_ after him and I'm ashamed."-she said remorseful.

"Why didn't you say anything?"-Sue demanded; she was pissed at her sister.

"I never in a million years thought Emily would act like this or do such a thing and certainly not to Leah. I am _so sorry_."-she cried; Emily tried to back out of the room but Sam's mother grabbed her arm glaring at her.

"How can you be so sure; how do you know he wasn't throwing himself at her like she said?"-Emily's dad asked.

"Because I saw it too."-A quiet voice said and they turned to see Emily's brother looking guilty.

"What?"-Seth shouted and he flinched.

" Is your whole damn family in on it?"-Harry shouted

"What was I supposed to do when not even my mom thought she would do this? No one would've believed me."-he said and it was true. No one took him seriously because of how simple he always acted and he would've been punished for lying.

"You see; that ring was for Leah, I was going to propose to her."-Sam said making everyone but Harry, Seth and Levi gasp. Sam wanted desperately for them to know he was telling the truth and get to Leah so she'd know as well.

"I still can't believe this."-Emily's dad said but you could see everything sink in by the weakness in his voice and sadness on his face; Seth snapped his finger.

"The wrapping paper! The wrapping paper on Emily's gift was the same gift he had for Leah how could I forget! She must have switched the gifts."-Seth said and that was the last shred of proof everyone who still held out doubt needed.

"Let's go, _now_!"-Emily's dad demanded and grabbed her arm and walked to the door.

"I'm sorry this happened and on Christmas. I'll come back tomorrow to get our things. Please apologize to Leah for me."-he said sadly and embarrassed as he opened the door.

"Wait!"-Sam shouted as he approached and Emily had the nerve to look hopeful.

"This belongs to Leah."-he hissed as his yanked the ring off her finger and wiped it off. Her dad could barely look him in the eyes as he muttered his apology and drug his home wrecker daughter to the car.

"I'm sorry, I'm _so_ sorry"-Emily's mom cried and Sue nodded but was still angry she hadn't said anything. "Please tell Leah I'm sorry."-and with that Emily and her family were gone and it was unspoken but known they were no longer welcomed in the Clearwater home, at least not for a while and Emily wasn't to be with them.

"Harry o-" Harry held up his hand silencing Sam before nodding his head to the stairs. Sam smiled and bolted for Leah's room.

"Leah,"-he called softly when he stepped inside and closed the door behind him. Leah was on her bed, face down and he could hear her hiccupping cries. He slowly approached her bed and sat on it before hesitantly reaching out to place his hand on her back. She stiffened.

"Leah that wasn't your gift; the note was meant for Emily."-he said quietly but she remained silent and face down.

"I love you Leah and I would never _ever_ do anything to hurt you, I would never cheat on you."-he continued speaking telling her how much he loved her and wouldn't dream of treating her anything other than respectful and loving. When she didn't respond he sighed not knowing what to do or say.

"The ring was, _is_ for you."-he said very quietly. The proposal went terrible and he didn't even know if he could get Leah to believe him; he sighed and with tears in his eyes moved to leave when he felt her hand on his wrist.

"What did you say?"-she asked and he just looked at her tear streaked face for a moment.

"I said the ring is for _you_. I came early because I wanted to show your family how much I loved you and would take care of you and asked your dad's permission."-he said as he wiped her eyes with his thumbs.

"Is that what you had to pick up the day we went to the movies?"-she asked hoarse.

"Yes,"-he said and they sat for what felt like hours with his hands cradling her face; she watched him hard and long and he knew she was making sure the decision she'd chosen was the right one.

"Look me in the eyes and tell me you _truly_ believe anything that note said was for you or that I cheated on you with Emily."-he said and she did; she gave him a hard look before blinking.

"If you want me to leave ad never bother you again just say it and I'll do it if that will make you happy."-he said although he had no intentions of doing that but she didn't need to know that.

"Ask me,"-she said

"Ask you what?"-he asked confused.

"Ask me to marry you."-she breathed and his heart leapt in his throat as he heard Sue and his mom shushing everyone downstairs. He fixed his clothes and got down on one knee, pulling the ring from his pocket.

"Leah I lo-"

"Yes!"-she shouted and tackled him to the floor. He laughed and crushed her to his chest before flipping them and kissing her.

They made out for a little while after he slipped the ring on before making their way downstairs where he knew they'd already heard but were trying to act casual.

"So is-"

"Everything alright?"-their mothers asked, poorly hiding their smiles of glee.

"We already know you all were eavesdropping."-Sam said sucking his teeth and rolling his eyes, but smiled and kissed Leah's forehead. Everyone instantly forgot about Emily and her drama and congratulated the happy newly engaged couple. Sue and Sam's mom couldn't stop crying and even got into a little argument over whose wedding dress Leah would wear.

"I hope they know I'm getting my own; there is no way in hell I'm wearing someone else's dress."-she whispered to Sam as they went into the dining room for dinner.

"Just humor them until they shut up."-he smiled and she chuckled as he pulled her chair out.

"To a Christmas we'll certainly never forget!"-Seth toasted and they all agreed until Sue and Sam's mom noticed what was in his and Sam's little brothers' glasses. After their whooping, everyone was seated and enjoyed dinner and being in the company of true friends and soon to be family.

Sam's proposal didn't go exactly as planned. Who was he kidding the shit went horribly horrible, but at least he knows it'll be the truth when Leah tells her friends and their future children and grandchildren: she'll never forget the day Sam Uley proposed to her.

* * *

_**AN: **__Hope you like! The semester is FINALLY over *happy dance*. I wrote up a few Christmas stories this weekend & was debating on posting them b/c they aren't that great & I know I can do better, but figured why not I can always delete them. I have serious writers block, not being able to remember fully how I laid out my stories FOP or SA so I needed to just write & write to get my mind off of study study study & just relax & enjoy writing. So this is one of the few stories that's helping w/that. I like Sam (he had no choice in what happened Emily did & he wanted to kill Bellawhore & her devil spawn so he's cool in my book) so I had to do a Sam/Leah story .I didn't know so many would end up proposal stories O_0._

_The needs of the many outweigh the needs of the few…so I need you to read then I need you to review…& I'll call off doomsday. Yes there are actual ppl who believe this Friday the earth is going to be destroyed by some huge comment or planet or something smh. The city of the Mayans where the prophecy came from's mayor closed the city down & tried telling these crazy ppl it's a false ;prophecy smh. I say if you really believe this then leave all your money to me, heavens knows I can use it. Just simple minded ppl smh. _


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